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#1
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A New Category of Sloth
We have already identified several categories of Sloth, including
* Sloth Mergers, the doddering ninnies who take the on-ramp at 45 MPH * Sloth Coasters, the guys who take their foot off the gas whenever they see a red light (or even a "stale green") somewhere before the horizon * Sloth Passers, the pricks who get into the passing lane and procees to "pass" the other vehicle with a 0.001 MPH speed differential, causing the pass to last forever * Sloth Speeders, the Sloths who accelerate like molasses in January but keep right on accelerating; eventually, if they have enough running room, they will get up to 80 MPH And now there are Sloth Spoilers, the assholes who sit right next to you and match the speed of the Sloth in front of you, preventing you from changing into the wide open lane in front of the SS and escaping the trap. To escape their clutches, you have to slow down to a speed even lower than the SS, change lanes behind him twice, and then punch it - that's assuming you have at least 3 traffic lanes with which to work. If there are only 2 lanes, you're screwed. Of all the different kinds of Sloth, I think I hate the Sloth Spoilers the most. |
#2
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A New Category of Sloth
In article >, newsgroup says:
>And now there are Sloth Spoilers, the assholes who sit right next to >you and match the speed of the Sloth in front of you, preventing you >from changing into the wide open lane in front of the SS and escaping >the trap. Don't you HATE these people?! I think its yet another case of "never attribute to malice what's best charged to stupidity"; I think they're so ingrained to follow along with the herd they don't realize what they're doing. -Kenny -- Kenneth R. Crudup Sr. SW Engineer, Scott County Consulting, Los Angeles H: 3630 S. Sepulveda Blvd. #138, L.A., CA 90034-6809 (310) 391-1898 |
#3
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A New Category of Sloth
> "never attribute to malice what's best charged to stupidity"
Yep: Sloth Thinkers -- the least common denominator of most of the problems on the roads. --Joe |
#4
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A New Category of Sloth
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#5
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A New Category of Sloth
Kenneth Crudup wrote: > In article >, newsgroup says: > > >And now there are Sloth Spoilers, the assholes who sit right next to > >you and match the speed of the Sloth in front of you, preventing you > >from changing into the wide open lane in front of the SS and escaping > >the trap. > > Don't you HATE these people?! I think its yet another case of "never > attribute to malice what's best charged to stupidity"; I think they're > so ingrained to follow along with the herd they don't realize what > they're doing. > > -Kenny > > -- > Kenneth R. Crudup Sr. SW Engineer, Scott County Consulting, Los Angeles > H: 3630 S. Sepulveda Blvd. #138, L.A., CA 90034-6809 (310) 391-1898 Yep. Had one last night. Congested traffic, parked in the left lane (only two lanes available). Late night. Could see brakes lighting up ahead and traffic switching. Finally caught up and there he is parked out there. Stayed there for 10 miles and as I was tired I didn't try to get around, just slowed it down by 2mph and lived with it. Couldn't tell if anyone had lit him up. Harry K |
#6
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A New Category of Sloth
Scott en Aztlán wrote: <brevity snip>
> We have already identified several categories of Sloth, including ----- You've identified categories of Sloth but never defined the term itself. From context it seems "anyone driving slower than you and/or anyone in front of you". Would that be correct? ----- - gpsman |
#7
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A New Category of Sloth
In article .com>, gpsman wrote:
> Scott en Aztlán wrote: <brevity snip> >> We have already identified several categories of Sloth, including > ----- > > You've identified categories of Sloth but never defined the term > itself. From context it seems "anyone driving slower than you and/or > anyone in front of you". Would that be correct? Here's mine: Someone who makes a certain driving move or drives slower than I would on a bicycle (including rate of acceleration) or someone who is blocking the natural flow of traffic with their slower than normal speed of driving in an inappropiate lane for that speed. Another catagory of sloth is someone who drives a compartitively powerful automobile but gets less performance out of it than I got out of the torqueless wonder car or my 1973 maverick. For instance, someone who merges on to an interstate with a 200+hp car at 35mph is sloth. |
#8
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A New Category of Sloth
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#9
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A New Category of Sloth
In article >,
Scott en Aztlán <newsgroup> wrote: >Here in SoCal, we have beattiful six-lane roads with 55 MPH speed >limits - and a bunch of MORON SLOTHS who never make it up beyond 35 or >40 MPH. For example, the Sloth Coasters let off the gas because they >see a red light a half-mile away (never realizing it is impossible to >"time" a sensor-controlled traffic signal, and that the sooner a >vehicle arrives at the sensor loop the sooner the light will change). Many sensor controlled signals are combination timer and sensor, at least during heavy traffic times. They go by a fixed schedule, often in sync with other lights on the roads, but will skip a phase if there is nothing on the sensor. So getting to the sensor sooner won't help unless it was just about time for the green phase to occur if something was sensed. There will usually be a "default green" direction (the larger street) that the lights will switch to if nothing is seen on the other sensors. Some sensors are only present at the front of the lane, while some intersections have them placed further back. Obviously, coasting or not coasting to a light that just turned red depends on how the signals are controlled (and whether you are on the road that get the "default green"), and whether there is already traffic ahead stopped or stopping on the sensor. Some places have pedestrian lights with countdowns. If these are visible, then they can be used to tell how long the remaining green time is, so that you can know if you'll make it. Of course, familiarity with the roads and signals helps. But many drivers probably pay too little attention to driving to notice how things are on the roads that the drive on every day. -- ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Timothy J. Lee Unsolicited bulk or commercial email is not welcome. No warranty of any kind is provided with this message. |
#10
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A New Category of Sloth
Scott en Aztlán wrote: > We have already identified several categories of Sloth, including > > * Sloth Mergers, the doddering ninnies who take the on-ramp at 45 MPH > > * Sloth Coasters, the guys who take their foot off the gas whenever > they see a red light (or even a "stale green") somewhere before the > horizon > > * Sloth Passers, the pricks who get into the passing lane and procees > to "pass" the other vehicle with a 0.001 MPH speed differential, > causing the pass to last forever > > * Sloth Speeders, the Sloths who accelerate like molasses in January > but keep right on accelerating; eventually, if they have enough > running room, they will get up to 80 MPH > > And now there are Sloth Spoilers, the assholes who sit right next to > you and match the speed of the Sloth in front of you, preventing you > from changing into the wide open lane in front of the SS and escaping > the trap. To escape their clutches, you have to slow down to a speed > even lower than the SS, change lanes behind him twice, and then punch > it - that's assuming you have at least 3 traffic lanes with which to > work. If there are only 2 lanes, you're screwed. > > Of all the different kinds of Sloth, I think I hate the Sloth Spoilers > the most. One of the great things about being a slow driver is i'm never bothered by all this little stuff that is driving you to an early grave. HAHAHAHAHAHA |
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